9 things I’ll miss while I’m away

  • doing the washing up; an absolutely therapeutic experience, cleansing all the troubles of the day, preferably with some good music to which to scrub and wipe. If I had a pound for each time someone has mentioned the word “dishwasher” followed by a question mark at the end of said same sentence, I would have reached my target already
  • rock paper scissors; a daily work routine with Lucy at work – always best of three, currently winning 72 to 59, so this has been going on a while now…..
  • watching Match of the Day with Matt; normally about four minutes in, he’ll say something like, “That was a bit like my goal for Bishops Waltham v College Youth blah blah blah…..” Probably the best conversations we have during watching football, even if some of them are nothing about football
  • correcting everyone else’s terrible English; I feel comfortable doing that with people whom I know, but with people I don’t know, I’m never sure if they’re going to smile or slap me after they’ve said, “When I was younger….” or something else ridiculous
  • much of the Indian Premier League (IPL); either the b&b won’t have ITV4 or whatever Freeview channel is showing it this year, or I’ll still be walking until late afternoon / early evening
  • the whole social bit at work, especially the daily COOF meetings, where innuendo and double entendre is king. Example exchange – “Can you put that in writing, Keith?” “Ok, to whom shall I give it?” “Oh, Keith, do it to me” “Ok, Lisa, you sure you’ve got room in your in box?” etc etc
  • Radio Solent; I guess I’ll have to get news on Pompey from national radio – except on 8th March when I’m in Cheltenham and Pompey are playing Cheltenham. Except it’s at Fratton. BBC Radio Combine-Harvester should be fine for that day then
  • my own bed; must be terrible for these young gigolos to be in a different bed every night, can never quite get used to the different feel each time
  • our shower; why is every shower just slightly different and takes two or three goes to get the hot / cold mix exactly the way you want it – well, I will have a different shower pretty much every day. By that, I do mean that I will have (at least) one shower every day, but I will sometimes be in the same place for two days
  • It was going to be more than 9 but my tea is ready…… Oh yeah, Pammy’s cooking.
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